S2 8 days post op

There isn't too much to update with today. The left side doesn't seem swollen but is still bruised. The right side is still swollen, but no worse than it had been; in fact, it may be just a tiny bit better. The bruising on the right looks better to me in the mirror too. I still have the newest raw spot on the left but it's not as "open" as the one I had with the last surgery. Last but not least, the bottom of the right incision is slowly healing. It gets smaller every day.
Overall, I think I'm coming along pretty well. There is no more pain (yea!) and the rest of me is back to normal. All that's left now is for the incisions to completely turn into scars and for the scars to fade. It would be nice if that would happen by tomorrow, but let's be realistic. It's going to take another week or more for the incisions not to look like incisions!

Today's photo doesn't look any different to me than yesterday's. maybe tomorrow's will show better improvement.
Happy New Year!!!

S2 1 week post op #2

I'm back from my post op appointment. Dr. T says everything looks good. Yea!!
He poked around a bit and took the stitches out, what few there were. I'm just glad they're gone. By the way, in taking the the one on the left out, a small area opened up. It totally reminds me of that raw spot I had last time on the right upper lid. If I remember right, it took about a week for it to heal that time. I hope this one heals fast. It seems to be around the same size too.
I asked him some of the questions I had, and he basically told me what I already know. Since there was no OP report from Dr. L, it was kind of hard for him to compare what he did to what Dr. L did. We talked about revising the upper left lid and he explained that due to the lack of excess skin, it may be fixable with a graft. He also said that the tiny piece in the lower left lid corner (the same one that Dr. L left) couldn't be easily removed because of the tear duct. His primary concern is functionality of the lids and I understand that. You cant take away so much tissue/skin and still have your eye lids work right. He mentioned possibly grafting that one too but seemed a bit more hesitant. So, I guess that little corner piece is there to stay, for now. We'll revisit the whole thing 11 weeks from now when I go back. I just hope these stupid things don't reincarnate again. I asked him about that too. He said if they are excised properly, they shouldn't come back. Well, that comment gave me something to chew on for the entire drive home. I've already experienced one rebirth, I don't want to go through another.
I put some ointment on the new raw spot, and across the rest of the incisions. I guess I can start to call them scars in another few days. Except for the raw spot and the bottom of the right incision, everything else is closed. No steri-strips this time either. I'll still continue to update once a day until everything is healed. I hope it's soon!
Here's another photo for this afternoon. The new raw spot doesn't look raw in the photo but trust me, its just like the one I had before. I had SO hoped to be able to get in the shower and let the water run on my face but I think I'll hold off for another day or so.
See ya tomorrow~

S2 1 week post op #1

Wow, it's been a week since the surgery. I looked back over the past week's photos and I think I'm coming along nicely. I'll know what Dr. T thinks in a few hours. haha.
Today, in the mirror, I notice that the bruising is still darker on the left than on the right but in the photos it looks about even. Not sure why it's like that. I'm not a photographer though so I'm sure there's some logical reason... I just don't know it. There is still a little swelling on the right, but the left looks kind of normal. That area at the bottom of the right incision is getting smaller but is still there. It tingles a little bit at times too. Weird. But, since it's getting smaller, I have to assume it's healing, just taking longer than the rest.
There is definitely some left over re-born xanthie on the right. Now that it's not as swollen or bruised, I can see it. Other than the chunk he took off the bottom of that side (where the slow healing spot is) it kind of looks the same as it did 2 weeks ago. I really hope he got the stuff out from underneath and that it wont get any bigger. Again, that's on my list of things to ask Dr. T today at my post op appointment.
Here is this morning's photo. The little blue things you see are little stitch pieces. They kind of stick out of the incision on either end but are not on the outside. I have no idea what they connect to or if they are even connected to anything. I guess I'll find that out in a few hours too.
I'll come back after the appointment and let you know what he says. I hope he thinks I'm doing as well as I do!

S2 6 days post op

Today I woke up a bit puffy around my eyes. If I remember right, this happened a few times with the last surgery too. I never did decide if it was related to the surgery or if this was a normal thing that I just hadn't noticed. I guess it doesn't matter! I cant say I'm any more swollen, just a little puffy. I also noticed today that the bruising on the right incision is better. It's that yellowish color that bruises turn when they are fading. There is still an area at the end of the right incision that doesn't look the same as the rest of that incision. I'm not sure if there are external stitches there but it does look like there may be. The left eye looks more bruised today but when I compare the photos, it doesn't quite look that way. It's like the yellow on that one has faded some showing the redder bruise more. Weird. Either way, they are healing and it appears they are healing faster than last time.
On another note, I washed my hair yesterday. Woo hoo! I did it in the kitchen sink! It turned out to be a little easier than I had expected. I didn't style it or anything, I just let it air dry. At least it's clean!
Tomorrow I have my post op appointment with Dr. T. I hope he thinks I'm coming along as well as I do!
Here's this morning's photo. Again, mostly flash, and it was taken before I put the ointment on. I wish I was a better photographer. I see detail in the mirror that the camera just doesn't pick up or doesn't focus on or shines it out. I don't know how to fix that though. I still think it's healing well.
See ya tomorrow~

S2 6pm update

Okay, so I thought I was better this morning. I was only half right. By noon, my eyes were sore and my vision was blurry. I have no explanation for that except that I have not been staring at the computer since last week. There is no increase in swelling or anything, just a soreness in the incisions. I'm thinking that all the talking I did today may have overworked some muscles or something. I also think that's what happened Christmas day. Unfortunately, I cannot do my job and not talk!

Frank and I went out to get pizza for dinner and when the bill came, I could not see it! That really freaked me out. I normally wear reading glasses, and didn't have them with me but I can usually hold something out to a distance and still be able to make it out. No such luck this evening. Needless to say, I came home, popped a few advil and now I'm going to lay down.
It's frustrating, especially since I felt so good earlier. Oh well...
No photo tonight. There is really no change in appearance since this morning. I also noticed that if I wait 24 hours, you can see the healing better. So, I'm hoping tomorrow morning to see less bruising. haha~

S2 5 days post op

After 5 days off, I'm returning to work today. I think I'm ready for that. My eyes actually look and feel pretty good, not normal, but good. There is still some swelling and a little tenderness on the right eye especially near the lower end of the incision. The left eye has very little swelling and isn't tender in any particular spot. Both incisions are closing, at different rates but still closing. The bruising looks to be about equal on both sides and that appears to be starting to resolve. I know the bruises take a bit longer though so I'll be patient!
Interestingly, I have not washed my hair yet! Yesterday, I had planned to do it and then chickened out. I'm pretty sure I'll be washing it today. It's been almost a week, and I honestly cannot remember the last time I let my hair go that long. It feels ick right now. It's on my "to do" list for today. I checked the post op instructions, it does not say anything about not getting the incisions wet so maybe if a little water gets on them, it will be okay.
Here is today's photo. No sun again. Blah! In 2 weeks, I hope to have nothing BUT sun! I'll be taking the banana boat sun block stick again, so no worries about sunburn on the incisions. Yea!
I think it's healing nicely. See ya tomorrow~

S2 96 hours post op

Good Morning!
No 10 pm update again last night. Not much had changed so I decided to wait until this morning.
I spent most of yesterday resting. I think it helped. My eyes aren't as swollen today, YEA!!! I'm still bruised but the bruising seems to be healing faster than it did in June. Another YEA! It's only been 4 days since the surgery but I seem to be closer to the 1 week mark from the last surgery. I went back and looked at the 96 hour post op photos from before, and yes, I do think I'm getting better faster this time. The 4 day mark was also the day that I washed my hair, with Nicole's help. Today, I'm alone but I really want to (need to) wash my hair. I'm going to try it and I'll let you know later how that goes. Since I don't have all those external stitches, this may be an easier project than last time. Hmmm.
The greatest news is that the pain has subsided to the point that it's only a little uncomfortable at times. No more bleeding either. I definitely think laying around doing nothing yesterday helped. I also noticed that those hard ridges I felt at first are softening up. When I touch the incision areas now, it almost feels normal. The left eye is healing faster than the right eye I think. I'm not sure what he did differently but I'll add that to my list of questions for Dr. T when I see him on Wednesday. As I noted yesterday, there is more xanthie remaining on the right side whereas he took most of the new xanthie off of the left. I wont know how noticeable that is until the bruising goes away some more. I'm guessing it will be removed in the next revision. Gosh, I don't even want to think about that yet. When I do that surgery, I'll be getting the left upper revised at the same time. Yeah, I don't want to think about that yet. Gotta get over this one first!
Here is today's photo. Lots of sunlight today. First time in nearly a week too!
Go back and compare with the first surgery, 96 hour point. You'll see the difference. I just hope the bruises are gone in less than 16 days!!!

S2 72 hours post op

Did you notice that there is no 60 hour update?? :) I was too tired last night to post and just figured I'd update everything this morning.
As you know, yesterday was Christmas and I couldn't just stay home. On the way to my mom's house, we stopped at dunkin donuts. It was cloudy and gray out but I had on a pair of sunglasses to cover my incisions. I got quite a few strange looks. I'm not sure if it was because I had sunglasses on in the dreary weather or if it was because people could see the incisions. I realized later yesterday that my sunglasses have graduated tint...meaning they are light at the bottom! Oh well. I guess I didn't cover up too much after all!
At my mom's house, I moved around more than I had been, and was talking and laughing a lot. That had an effect on my incisions. The right one started to bleed a little from the lower edge. Not heavy bleeding but a spotting kind of thing and it hurt. I didn't take my ointment with me so after wiping the blood a few times, I noticed it was getting pretty dry. My mom had some bacitracin so I put a dab of that on it to try and keep it from splitting any more. I'm not so sure it helped. It spotted on and off again a few more times before we ended up coming home. When I got here, I cleaned off the area around the incision and used the erythromycin and also the tobradex from the last surgery. There seemed to be a tiny piece of something that was sticking out a little bit. It wasn't a stitch but may have been a piece of skin or scab or something. I pushed it back in and mushed more ointment into it. I took my advils and darvocet and layed down. I fell asleep for a few hours and when I woke up, the incisions were dry again so I put more ointment on them. This morning, they both look normal again, what ever normal is for incisions. The little piece of what ever it was slid back and hopefully it will stay there. The swelling isn't as bad today but the bruising has really come up. I expected that. Interestingly, on the right incision, where Dr. T had to leave xanthie, the bruising is around the xanthie and not in it. It looks kind of weird. It looks like he got most of the reborn xanthie from the left side but there is still a piece on the right that he didn't remove. It's hard to tell exactly though because of the bruising. I'm not sure if that piece he left will be noticeable or not. Once the bruising goes down, I'll know more. I'm hoping that even though there is some reborn xanthie on the right that he was able to remove the xanthie underneath so it wont get any bigger. I'll have to ask him when I go for my post op visit on Wednesday.
On another note, my hair needs washing. I may try to do it in the kitchen sink. I don't want to put any more stress on the right incision because today it seems closed and neat as opposed to yesterday so I may try to hold off another day. Doing it in the sink would require me to lean over forward, and I think that may strain my face a bit. I'm not sure. Maybe I'll try it just to see if it can be done. I'll let you know how that goes.
I'm going to take some advil and relax on the couch. Here is this morning's photo. I'm sorry I didn't take one last night. I would have liked to have documented the difference. It does look better today than it did last night. Also, this photo is before I put more ointment on, again to reduce the glare.
See ya later~

S2 48 hours post op

Merry Christmas!!

Today, I'm still swollen, but not as much as yesterday. More gunk came off of the incisions too so they look better. Much better than the 48 hour point of the June surgery. I'm going to try and wash closer to the incisions today and get more of the gunk off. On the left incision, at the end, there is a blue stitch that is sticking up. I can see it out of the corner of my eye and it is bothering me SO much! Looking closely at it, I don't think I can clip it because it looks like its an extension of what is inside. It's really just a loop of blue stitch just hanging there but I don't know what would happen if I cut it so it's probably best to leave it alone. It sure is annoying though!
I would also really like to wash my hair but I cant get my face totally wet yet. Last time, Nicole helped me lean back and use the hand held shower head. I kind of wish she or Samantha were here to help me do that again.
Nothing else really to report, I feel okay at the moment. I did yesterday morning too but by 1:00pm, I was knocked out. We'll see how I do today. I'm going over to my moms in a little bit for Christmas. I need to get off the computer and get ready!
Have a wonderful holiday and I'll be back later for tonight's update.

S2 36 hours post op

I think I'm seeing some improvement tonight. I'm still swollen and feel overall weird but the incisions look a lot better than they did earlier today. I think the oozing has stopped and everything is starting to dry up. As I said earlier, not having so many external stitches is making a huge difference on the appearance. My face still feels distorted and the area around the incisions is hard. The right side is especially hard under the incision. When I go for my post op next week I'm going to ask Dr. T what he did!! Speaking of Dr. T, he called today to check on me. He said the swelling is normal and that it sounds like I'm doing fine.
I slept a lot again today and I'm going back to bed shortly. I do feel better when I'm laying down, well, propped up on pillows but reclining. I hope to get some better sleep tonight.
Here is the photo for the evening. I shot it before I put the ointment on so it wouldn't have such a glare. Can you see the improvement? Don't the incisions look better without all those stitches?? :) You can see how puffy and tight the skin is. Trust me.. it feels really strange!
See ya tomorrow~

S2 24 hours post op

This morning I woke up really swollen. It's just the lower lids and it felt kind of funny. Now, about 2 hours later, it's not as bad. Maybe it was a morning thing..? !!As for the pain, it has settled into that familiar uncomfortable feeling. There is still some pain, but not like yesterday. I slept very lightly last night so I don't feel rested today. As before, I was afraid of mushing my face into the pillows and messing up something. Thankfully, my face stayed upright all night!
I'd really love to wash my face to get some of the gunk off, but I know better. That's still another day away, at least. I'll do my modified wash that I invented in June. That will have to hold me for now. I noticed when I put the ointment on, it cleans it up just a tiny bit each time so that helps a little too.
My left eye is still blurry a little bit. I'm not really sure why. The lid closes better than it did yesterday morning but it's like I have to consciously push it shut all the way. When I blink, the lower lid doesn't feel like it's all the way up. I'm not sure any of that made sense but that's the best I can describe it. The right eye is more swollen but the lids seem to close okay, without any extra effort. The right eye is also tearing up a little. I think that happened last time too.
I think the biggest difference between this surgery and the last one is that I can rub my eyes! Last time, there was no where to rub that didn't have stitches. This time, I can rub from the top and that feels good! I still have to be careful not to overdo it but at least when they itch, or tear up, I can rub!!!
I also managed to do a little work today. I know, shame on me. I only did about an hour or so. Nothing major, just little stuff. Everything else can wait till Monday.
That's it for this morning's update. I'm going to take my pills, and my ice packs to the bedroom and watch TV.
Tomorrow is Christmas, yea! I did my shopping early, so I have everything here. Nothing is wrapped though. Silly me forgot to buy wrapping paper. I'll see what I can dig up around the house and maybe I'll be able to wrap a few things.
In the mean time, here is this mornings photo. I definitely think having the stitches inside makes a difference on how it looks. Still a lot of gunk and stuff and I cant wait to clean them! It's hard to see the swelling in these cropped shots, you'll just have to take my word for it! Believe me... they're swollen!
I'll update again later tonight.

S2 12 hours post op

I slept a lot this afternoon, much more than I had expected to. I've been taking the pink tic-tacs (darvocet) and advil. The combination of the two seems to help better than either of them alone. I've also been using the ice packs, 15 minutes every hour. I am still in pain but I think its under control. I'm definitely more swollen than earlier and I can see the bruising coming up. You cant really see the bruising that well in tonight's photo, but in the full face shot and in real life, it's there. There is also a lot of oozing and some bleeding. They didnt put bandages on this time, so I'm seeing this part of the process for the first time. I have to wait for the oozing and stuff to stop and the skin to start closing before I can clean it up so that's still a few days away.
One thing I noticed in just these 12 hours is that my left eye which wouldn't close all the way earlier is now closing better. Thats good. I was a little worried that it could be a problem.
So, I'm going to take my pills and go back to bed. I'll update again tomorrow morning.

surgery #2 first post op

I made it back in once piece. Yea.

This surgery was definitely different from start to finish.
We left the house around 7:30 and got to the center before 8. The sign in procedure was the same, as were the people working there. The wait was much shorter though. By 8:30, I was in the surgical chair thing getting hooked up to all the gadgets. My blood pressure was 151/89. That's pretty high for me. The nurse said not to worry about it. She started the IV in the same place as she did the last time and that went fine. There was a different anesthesiologist there. He talked to me a bit about my history and checked my lungs and heart. No good meds to start me off like before LOL. Dr. T came over and poked at my eyes a bit, took a few photos and said he would take off as much as he could but if he took too much off, my eyes wont close. He doesn't want that (neither do I) and said that once the skin grows back again, we'll do another revision. Then they rolled me into the surgery room, reclined the chair and positioned me the way Dr. T wanted me. They hooked up a nasal oxygen thing, I guess because I smoke and then sort of strapped my arms in. They also attached this really cold patch to my back. Being WIDE awake, I asked them what the heck it was. They said it was to ground me for the electrocautery thing. Dr. T reminded them that the oxygen would have to be cut off while the electrocautery thing was in use. It was somewhere around this point that the anesthesiologist slipped something into my IV and I felt woozy. Awake but definitely woozy. There was some talking and I remember Dr T asking the nurse (or someone) if she knew the song that was playing. Without thinking, I said "I do!". Dr. T laughed. The nurse didn't know the song at all. It was a Madonna song from way back when. At this moment, I cant recall which song though. Turns out the nurse person was born in 1990 so yeah, she wouldn't really know any 80's Madonna. It was kind of funny.
I have to say, I definitely wasn't as asleep as I was at the last surgery. I remember smelling the electrocautery thing as it was hopefully burning away the remaining xanthie. I also remember feeling pain. I mentioned that to Dr. T and he shot me with more Novocaine. That hurt and I told him that too! At that point he said he was almost done so they didn't want to give me any more than that. I also asked the anesthesiologist what he gave me, he named 2 drugs that I wasnt familiar with and also propofol, the white stuff.
After he finished up, they sat me up in the chair and rolled me into the recovery room. They immediately put ice on my face. It kept sliding off and finally the nurse said lean your head back and that wont happen! (yeah, duh me..!) After about 5 minutes, she bought me some coffee and offered me toast. Like before, I really didn't want the toast but the coffee was good. Dr. T came over to talk to me again and explained again that he got rid of what he could without damaging the function of my eye lids. He also told me that most of the stitches are internal, the ones that dissolve on their own. He did put a few regular stitches in also just to make sure things stay closed.
After that, I went back to the waiting room, Frank signed the papers and we left. First stop--Dunkin Donuts. I sat in the car with my sunglasses on. Not those huge medical ones, just my regular pair. There are no bandages this time, so the incisions are totally exposed. While he was in the store, I looked at the incisions. They're just as big as before, even slightly longer on the right but there aren't that many external stitches so it doesn't look as frightening. Interestingly, my left eye doesn't feel right. As I was examining it, I recalled Dr. T. saying that the skin would relax in a few days and be more normal. I hope he's right. I got home, and within minutes, the pain set in. Novocaine wears of way too fast. It's a painful hurt this time, not just a regular hurt like before. I can also still smell the burning flesh. I'll be glad when that smell goes away. I ate my sandwich and drank my coffee, and called my mom. She had called here early this morning but we had already left. As I was talking to her, the pain came on more and more. The left hurts way more than the right at the moment. So that, along with they eye not closing quite right and the vision being blurry in that eye, I'm pretty down. Not depressed down, just down. Frank got me settled in my bed and then he left. I'm all alone, except for the cat. This sucks. Being alone normally doesn't bother me, but I don't feel good at all and wish I had someone here to talk with to get my mind off the pain. As expected, the darvocet isn't really doing anything. Its not even making me sleepy. My mom suggested taking another one in 2 hours instead of waiting the 4 hours. I know you cant take more than 6 100mgs in a 24 hour period though so I'm not sure how many or how often I should take them other than what's written on the bottle. I honestly wish I had something stronger. Definitely more painful this time. Not just uncomfortable like before.
Here is the first post op photo. I don't think I need to photograph closed eyes this go'round because only the lowers were done and those are well seen on just the open eye photo. The swelling and bruising have not set in yet, but I'm sure that will happen soon enough. I'll try to update again in 12 hours to let you know how I'm feeling.

2nd beginning update #5

Good morning~
Today's the day. Surgery number 2 in T-minus 1.5 hours.
Not much to write this morning, other than I wish I could drink a big cup of coffee. I think my nerves are getting the best of me right now.
I'll try to come on after the surgery and give a run down of what happens. Samantha is not here with me this time so I'm kind of on my own. Should be interesting.

See ya later... wish me luck!

2nd beginning update #4

Today I had my pre-op physical with my PCP. Everything looks good so I guess I'm ready. They are supposed to fax the medical forms and EKG to the surgi-center but I faxed a set myself along with the patient history forms when I got home just to make sure. I'll still take a copy with me.
I also went to CVS and got the prescriptions filled. Total cost $35.00! Big difference from before. The tube of ointment is still little but for $16.00 I cant complain; its way better than the $133.00 for the tobradex!

On another note, yesterday I found out that my daughter may not be able to get off from work to go with me this time because it's right before the holiday. I'm kind of bummed over that but I understand. Frank has agreed to go if she cant. I'm not sure he would stay with me afterwards though. I'll find out more on that in the next few days. Maybe I could convince Nicole to come over for a day or so. I guess I just dont want to be alone, which is strange for me. I'm a real loner type---most of the time.
I'll be back to post again next Tuesday, the night before surgery #2.

2nd beginning update #3

I've been approved!!!
That's right. I got the letter from my insurance company today. They reviewed the documentation sent by Dr. T and approved the procedures as submitted. Wowzers.
I still have to get the pre-op testing done and my plan is to take care of that on Tuesday morning. The documentation they gave me says it should be done no less than 2 weeks prior to the surgery but as I said previously, I didn't want to do it and have my insurance pay for it if the surgery wasn't going to happen. Tuesday is the 15th, and the surgery is scheduled for the 23rd. Talk about cutting it a bit close. Last time, I had the pre-op 10 days prior. This one will be only 8. I'll be sure to get a copy of the pre-op paperwork to take with me again. In June, the surgery center never received it from my doc, even though I watched them fax it. I'm sure glad I thought to bring it with me!
So... here we go again. For some reason, I'm a little more nervous about the procedure than before. I don't even know why. Okay, maybe I do. It's 2 days before Christmas, 2 weeks and 4 days before a party I've planned for my mother's 80th birthday and 3 weeks before my vacation. At least my stitches will be taken out the day before New Years. (haha)

As I mentioned in the last post, I've been trying to lose a few pounds. We all know how dieting goes. Up and down- LOL. On a good note, I am just about the same weight I was when I had the first surgery. Still a little more than I should be, but acceptable I guess. I wanted to lose more but I cant say for sure that will happen in the next 10 days. I'll keep trying though.

Here are some photos I took tonight. Total flash again because it's night time. I'll post a good set right before the surgery and as before, there will be plenty of post-op photos. You can sort of see that xanthie is back on the left upper lid but not nearly as bad as it was. When Dr. T and I were planning this surgery, he was going to include revision of the uppers along with the lowers but I opted to only do the lowers because the born again xanthies are more obvious on those and that's what bothers me the most. I have a feeling I'll be glad for that somewhere down the road but somewhere further down the road, I'll wish I had done it all at once. ;)



I'll be back for a quick update on Tuesday after the post op.

2nd beginning update #2

I got a letter from my insurance company yesterday; they received the request for authorization for my surgery. They didnt approve or deny it yet but they have requested notes from the surgeon. He submitted 2 codes for approval, one for the removal of the benign lesions and the other for "muscle/skin graft, head/neck". That second code is the one that flagged the review. From what I read, my insurance will cover that code but only under certain circumstances, most of which do not apply to me at all. There was one slightly gray area that I may be able to slip into but that will depend on how Dr. T presents the situation. The letter states that once they receive the information they requested from Dr. T, they'll make a determination. I'm a little nervous about this getting approved this time. The procedure code he used has a rather high reimbursement rate--somewhere around 1400-1500.00 and to pay that out of pocket would be tough. I guess I'll just have to keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best. I still want to have it done but I'd much rather have my insurance pay for it if possible. Ugh. By the way, I have not gone for the pre-op physical yet. I have all the paperwork but I'd rather have the approval first. I'm also taking this little bit of time to lose a few pounds. Somehow (haha) I've gained a little bit since the summer. I have 7 more pounds to lose to get to my goal and that will be a total of 15 pounds lost.
No new photos today. The xanthies definitely came back but are no where near what they were when all this started last spring. My daughter and I were looking at some photos of a vacation from last January. The xanthies were so huge then. Big, thick and ugly. Now, they are flat and thin, but still there. Not as noticible as before but I can see them, and I want them gone!

I'll update again as soon as I find out anything else. Wish me luck!

2nd beginning brief update

Today I received the paperwork for the surgery in the mail. It's scheduled for the 23rd of December. Hmmm. Not exactly the day I wanted but I guess it's okay. They dont have approval from my insurance yet but the surgical coordinator still thinks that wont be a problem. I wish I was as confident as she is!
The pre-op instructions are different this time. No long list of "dont's" and just slightly different in general. He also gave me 2 prescriptions. The ointment is something different this time, Erythromycin ointment. I'm hoping its cheaper! I still have one refill of the Tobradex and about a half a tube left from June. The other one is for pain pills. That's new. It's Darvocet which isnt that strong but it will probably take that little edge of uncomfortable off. Cool. I'll go with that!
So, if the insurance approves everything, it looks like I'll have a train wrecked face for christmas. Fun. Gosh I hope everything turns out right. Vacation exactly 3 weeks post op. No room at all for error~
No photos today. They look the same. I'll update as soon as the insurance approves... or denies.

24 weeks (+1day) the second beginning

Today I met Dr. T and it appears that I'm headed back for more surgery.
Dr. T explained that Dr. L only removed the skin and none of the tissue/fat underneath and that's why my lovely xanthies are coming back. They were never fully removed!! He took some photos, felt the skin, then used a tweezer type thing to pinch the skin where the xanthies are (mimicking removal of that skin maybe?) and then we talked. He feels he can work with my eyes to fix them but says we may need to do it piece by piece; meaning that we cant just go in and pull it all out at once because my eyes wouldn't fit properly afterwards. I told him that I'm okay doing it little by little as long as the end result is that they will be gone and for longer than 5 months. It appears I have enough skin to go ahead and start this process and we have 3 potential dates, Dec 9th, Dec 18th or Dec. 23rd. The 23rd is a definite but since I have that Caribbean vacation planned (yes, again...) I'm not so sure I want to do it on the 23rd, however, he feels 3 weeks will be enough healing time. I'll go back and check the 3 week post op mark and see how I was before I agree to that though. I have to keep in mind that we are only doing the lowers this time and they did heal faster than the uppers with much less swelling etc. They were bruised and I looked a little beat up but he may be right. 3 weeks...hmmm, a tan would certainly hide any left over bruising ;). I just went back and looked at the 3 week update. Visible scars but not bad. This could work... I'm hoping for the 18th though because 4 weeks gives the eyes 5 more days and more is better for healing. My daughter is not available on the 9th and I'm not sure I want to do this without her. She may not realize it but I'm really glad she was with me before and would really like to have her with me again.

Anyway, I also spoke with the surgical coordinator. This is a different one from last time. She seemed to feel that my insurance will cover it again but Dr. T. said they may lump this into the non covered blepharoplasty category because we're removing the fat below the skin this time along with the new xanthies. We'll see. She gave me the pre-op paperwork and told me to go ahead and get it done. This time they want bloodwork along with the EKG because if they do it on the 9th, the surgi center for that date requires it. They have two that they use. I'd kind of rather go back to the same place as before--on the 18th! Hopefully my insurance sees that this is a work in progress and approves it but if I have to pay for it, I guess I'll just have to tighten up the budget and go for it. I want my face fixed.
I'll update again as soon as I get a date.

Meanwhile, take a look at todays photos. Its dark outside so this is all flash, no sunlight. You can really see the xanthies now.

23 weeks (-1 day) post op

I hadn't planned on taking so long to do the next update but nothing had really changed until recently. I noticed a few weeks ago that I could see my xanthies again! What..?? For the first few days, I thought it was my imagination playing tricks on me but no, my lower lids have them again. I cant say it was totally unexpected as I was warned they could return. They are faint, and I only see them when I look closely at my eyes. What's weird is that they are the same exact shape and size as before! It's almost like there was more xanthie that wasnt removed deep in the tissues and is now coming to the surface. Interestingly, there is a nice neat incision line right down the middle of these new lesions. There also appears to be a slight return of xanthie on my left upper lid. That one kind of blends into the scar so I'm not worried about it yet. These lower lids though... ugh!
If you remember, I had said previously that I would probably go for a revision of the areas Dr. L couldn't remove but I certainly didnt expect it to be so soon. You may also remember that Dr. L left the practice and after several searches online, I cant find him in a new location anywhere near here. Bummer. I liked him. So, today I made an appointment to see the new occular plastic guy in the group, Dr. T. The appointment is for a week from Thursday, 9 days from now. I'm going to ask to have the lower lids revised or fixed but not the uppers. I'd be really surprised if my insurance covers it a second time but we'll see. If he agrees to fix them, I may end up paying out of pocket. If that happens, I would probably push the surgery out until late winter or early spring. Once again, I have vacation in the Caribbean planned for January so if we do this now it will have to be done by the first or second week of December. That would give me the same 5 weeks of healing time and that worked fine. I think I'm getting a little ahead of myself now. I'll just have to see what he says next week. It's entirely possible he'll not want to touch them...

Here are today's photos. Compare them to August's photos (from the last update) and you can see a slight difference. It appears they were coming back then but I hadnt noticed it yet.



I'll be back next Thursday for another update. Wish me luck!!

12 weeks (-1 day) post op

Hello!
Tomorrow will be 12 week post surgery. Has it really been that long? Wow.
I would definitely say that at this point, my eyes are healed. All of that tightness and soreness, the lumps etc---all gone. For the most part, my eyes feel normal now. Don't get me wrong, they aren't baby smooth but they are far better than they were 2 months ago. One of the best things is that I don't always have to "cover" my eyes with makeup every time I leave the house. I can still see scars but I'll take the scars over the xanthies any day!
As you already know, there were a few pieces left that Dr. L couldn't remove because there wasn't enough skin. I'm thinking in a years time, I'll have enough skin to do a revision to get rid of those last few spots. They are small, and not nearly as noticeable but I know they are still there so if I can get my insurance to pay again, I'll have that fixed.
Speaking of insurance, let me tell you, I'm actually embarrassed at how little they paid Dr. L. Here is a breakdown of it all:

Date/Doc-------------------------------Charge----Ins paid
05.05 Initial visit Dr. L.-------------140.00-----60.00
05.05 photos Dr. L--------------------80.00-----16.68
05.23 pre op/EKG Dr. C-------------162.00-----74.21
06.01 pre op Dr. L--------------------130.00-----44.10
06.03 Anesthesia Dr. O-------------1300.00---1300.00 *
06.03 Surgery Dr. L-----------------7200.00----454.09
06.03 Pathology-----------------------105.00---capitated **
06.03 Surgery Center----------------6600.00----461.88 ***
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Totals:-----------------------------15,717.00------2410.96
Total out of my pocket---------------------------- 250.00
Total prescriptions--------------------------------266.00+

* The anesthesia doc was originally paid 947.70 from my insurance. She refused that and sent it back to be reprocessed to pay in full. They actually paid her the full amount...
** The lab is capitated which means that my insurance pays them a certain flat rate amount of money every month regardless of how many claims they have.
*** My deductible of 250.00 was applied to this charge. Total that the surgery center was paid 711.88.
+ I do not have a prescription plan, and tobradex ointment does not have a generic version available yet.

I have to wonder, if my insurance didn't approve this surgery, would I have had to pay 15,717.00??? As I said, I feel bad that Dr. L got paid so little for the work he did. He definitely deserved more. He participates with my insurance so he had to accept what they paid. Dr. O, the anesthesiologist does not participate with them therefore, she didn't have to accept it. She's making a fortune... I cant totally complain about that though since I did wake up afterwards!!!

Here are today's photos. Notice the significant improvement! I may update again in another month or so. I still owe you guys one photo with make up. Will do that too one day too~
Take care...



Edit to add:
I noticed after I posted this update that at least 2 people had found my blog and commented.
I am glad that this is finally showing up in searches and that someone may be helped by the information I have written. After so much of my own searching and finding nothing, I totally understand the frustration!
To anyone reading this, if you have questions about the procedure I had that I didnt answer through the blog, feel free to leave comments. I will check from time to time and answer anything I'm able to.
Thanks for reading!

6 weeks post op

I have to say the last week went by really quickly!
My scars did very well in the tropical sun. I got very tanned but I put sunblock with 50 spf (Banana Boat Sport stick) under my eyes and on my upper lids. Surprisingly, my face is the only part of me that didn't burn! Every other piece of exposed skin burned--including my scalp! Anyway, the slight issues I was having are continuing to get better. The tightness is minimal at best and I almost dont feel it at all. The soreness is still there a little bit on the left upper lid but the other lids are better.
Putting makeup on was an interesting experience. As I may have written before, my eyelids on top are now shaped slightly different. I no longer have that "ridge" on the uppers to guide me in applying eyeliner but I still managed to get it on and makeup looks pretty good! Will get a shot of that next week.
In the mean time, here are my newly tanned eyes. Tans hide a lot!

5 weeks post op

Today marks 5 weeks! It's also the day before I leave on my tropical vacation. Yea! Since last week, there has been some improvement with the corners and also with the soreness. They still aren't totally 100% healed and I can tell but they are better than they were this time last week. The scars continue to fade slowly but they are fading. I think once I get a little sun they wont be as noticeable. I'll post photos when I get back so we can compare.
In the mean time, here are today's photos. I have to go pack for trip. See ya next week!

4 weeks and 1 day post op

Can you believe its been 4 weeks? A whole month since the surgery. Wow.
I cant really say much has changed. I do believe the corners are loosening up a tiny bit. They still feel tight at times but not like it was. I still have the soreness in some spots, I notice that mostly when I rub my eyes. The right upper and the left lower don't feel that sore but the left upper and right lower still do. The lumpiness seems to have improved a bit too.
Last Friday, I tried makeup for the first time. That was interesting. My eyelids don't look like they've been reshaped but guess what... they have been. Before the surgery, I would make a fairly thick black line on top in an effort to hide xanthie. I also used darker eyeshadow colors over the xanthies to try to mask them. No need to do that any more. ;) It took some minor adjustments but I finally got the liner on so that it looked normal. The eyeshadow was a different story. The scars on top are indented, therefore they clearly showed with shadow color on them. I didn't know what else to do with that so I just left it. I may need to change eyeshadow colors. What I have used (for the past 25 years) may no longer work right. I'll experiment with new colors over the next few day and figure out what works better. It may be something as simple as using non frosted instead of my trusted frosted colors. Hmmm. We'll see. No photos of that yet. Still a bit too messy!
Here are the 4 week photos. Well, 4 weeks and 1 day~
Maybe one day I'll post a full face shot!!!
See ya in a few days~

25 days post op

I hadn't planned on doing an update before Wednesday (4 week mark) but I was taking photos and thought the eyes were looking good so I decided to share!
I still have a little tightness in the corners; more on the left than right, but its lessening as time goes on. Much better than it was even a week ago. The tender spots are still there but those too are improving.
10 days left before vacation. It will be interesting to see how a tan looks with scars and not xanthies!
In the mean time... Life goes on~

3 weeks post op

A whole 3 weeks have passed! Its almost hard to believe.
Anyway, I didn't update yesterday because there was no real change in anything. In fact, there was no change today either but since its the 3 week mark, I figured I'd add photos for fun.
I think they are continuing to heal. I still have a little tenderness in some areas but I keep reminding myself that it has only been 3 weeks. I keep hoping that the scars will fade more... we'll see.
I probably wont update that often now. Maybe every few days or so just to see how the scars are doing. I look forward to that 6 month post op photo where the scars are all faded!!!
see ya soon~

19 days post op

Finally, the little raw spot is healed-or at least I think it is. The incisions on my left eye are still a bit tender and the inner corner is still tight. I'm not so sure that will ever change but so much. Kind of hard to explain why on a blog, you'd have to see different expressions on my face to see what I'm talking about. Photos dont show it that well so I guess you'll just have to take my word for it!
Today's photos have sunlight in them again. Scars are still pretty visable but are fading. Yea! Only 2 weeks until I go away. I so hope the scars fade some more by then. Even if they dont, by then I can use a little makeup to cover what ever is left. In fact, I might try some makeup later this week. I want to be sure the raw spot is totally healed first.
More tomorrow~

18 days post op

No big change today. The little raw spot is still there but is getting smaller. I washed my face before I took today's photos so it looks a little pink.
Something I forgot to mention in earlier posts; I have some slight tenderness around both left incisions. I only feel it when I touch them so I dont always think about it. It feels sort of like the underlying tissues and nerves are trying to put themselves back together but haven't quite figured out how to do it-if that makes any sense. I'm hoping that goes away with time. I'm not too concerned about it at this point. Of note, I dont feel it along any of the right side incisions. hmmm. That just goes along with my theory that my left side was more of a challenge for Dr. L.
Todays photos: No real change!

17 days post op

Quick update today. Nothing has really changed. The stye is all gone and healed but the little raw spot is still hanging in there. You can see it in today's photos; its that tiny little red scab spot. Its healing, s-l-o-w-l-y.
The scars are more visible today because there's no sunshine supplementing the flash. You can see everything~
More tomorrow.

16 days post op

Not a lot of change for today. The little raw spot is finally healing. It's still there but I can see a definite change towards getting smaller and more shallow. The photos are a bit deceptive on my left upper lid. It looks like there is a large area that isn't healed and that's not quite correct. The incision/scar is different on the left and the flash catches it in a weird way making it look like a larger open area. It's not. The (former) raw spot is really only about 2mm x 3mm which is pretty small and its at the very end of that incision. One interesting thing I noticed today is that the left lower scar is fading faster than the right lower one. Also, if I hold the mirror up above eye level, I see more darkness around the scars and when I hold the mirror below eye level, the darkness seems to disappear. Probably some strange optical illusion, I'm sure.
On another note, remember that stye I mentioned yesterday? Well, as expected, I couldn't let it just sit there and bother me any longer. It hurt. Now it's gone. I've done that before so it was easy. I also flushed the eye with the visine tears and then put another blob of the ointment in it. Right now, it feels 100% better than it did this time yesterday. Problem solved...
I saw a friend of mine, Amira today. She commented on how much better my eyes look. That made me feel good! I hope that means that all the tiny little flaws I'm seeing aren't really noticeable to other people!!!
That's it for now.

15 days post op

I woke up with puffy eyes again this morning. Gees, I'll be happy when that stops! Then again, it could have been happening all my life and I just never noticed it before! ~sigh~
The little raw spot is still present today. It's not red or wide open so I think it's okay. It just has to heal and it's taking its sweet time doing so. While I was inspecting it this morning, I noticed a stye starting to develop around the middle of my left lower lid. Nice time for one of them to show up huh? I get them every so often but its usually the result of using makeup that is too old. Not this time! I put a big dollup of the antibiotic ointment IN that eye today to help it along. That made my vision nice and blurry for about 30 minutes! I know better than to bother it but that probably wont stop me once it gets a little bigger. If you've ever had a stye you know how annoying they are.
Otherwise, everything is healing up as it should, I guess. I still have dark circles around the lower incisions but I'm hoping they will fade. Did you know that dehydration can cause dark circles? **goes to get bottle of water** I'll have to remember to drink more water and see if they go away. I also see some little bruising areas rising up to the surface of my skin today. Nothing like what had been there but you know how bruises are---weird. Probably some deeper bruises that are now just resolving.
Nothing else really worth reporting. Except for that stye, my eyes feel fairly normal. Even the corner tightness has improved. I dont feel it at all on the right but still just a little on the left. Dr. L must have had a hard time with that eye. It seems like he had to pull skin from my nose to work it into my eyelid, if you can imagine that. At least that's how it feels. Like its pulling from the side of the bridge of my nose.
Here are today's photos. You can see the raw spot. Its not really raw anymore but for consistancy, that's what I'm calling it. I think it looks worse in the photos than it does in real life.
See ya tomorrow~

2 weeks post op

It's hard to believe that it was 2 weeks ago today that I had the surgery. The time has flown by! For the most part, the bruising and swelling issues are almost gone. The little raw spot is still giving me a little grief though. I've been keeping it dry but today I got some water on it and it softened up again. Absentmindedly, I rubbed it and some dried ick stuff rubbed off. Now it's semi-raw again but smaller. I also noticed some redness around it--but not in it. I'm not 100% certain or convinced that it's infected though. The corner of the other eye is red also and that incision is completely closed. Everything else is going quite well. The scars are still pretty visible but just as the bruising has faded, the scars should too. It all just takes time. I've got 3 weeks until my vacation for them to fade! (Just kidding) I'm happy with the results and I'm sure they'll look fine for my trip. There are still 3 little xanthie spots but they are nothing compared to what was there.
I was thinking about make up this morning. Everything I read (about blepharoplasty not xanthie removal specifically)says you can start wearing make up at around the 2 week mark. I have not even considered that yet and I don't plan on it until the raw spot heals completely. I'm sure those photos will be interesting..!
In the mean time, here are today's photos. Looks good!

13 days post op

Not too much of a change in status today. The little raw spot feels much better at the moment. I didn't put any ointment on it last night, and I didn't let it get wet today. It looks like it dried up a bit and definitely doesn't itch as much. Maybe I'll just let it be for another day or so and see if it will heal up.
My eyes were a bit puffy this morning, but that went away after the first cup of coffee! The bruising is minimal now, as it was yesterday. It just looks like I have not slept in a few days...! I still have those little lumpy areas across the upper lids and I hope they will un-lump one day. Not really noticeable unless you look closely at my eyes. Some one else probably wouldn't notice it but I do because I'm scrutinizing them at least 5 times daily! The incisions are still fairly noticeable but they look way better than yellow free form blobs all over the place.
My eyelid corners are still a little tight, again, the left more than the right. I don't want to stretch it too much because of the raw spot but once that heals I may be able to stretch it some to relax it. When I'm looking straight ahead I don't notice it but if I look slightly up or try to fully open my eyes, its noticeable. I have no idea if this is normal or not but its not really a problem. Now that the swelling and bruising are almost done, I'll probably focus on the scars next. They wont fade very fast so after tomorrow, my updates will probably be less frequent, maybe. We'll see and as always, if there is any kind of change, I'll post it right away!.
Here are today's photos. Not bad huh...?

12 days post op

Not too much progress to write about today. The raw spot is back, right in the same place. I don't think it likes water. It itches like crazy too. I've been keeping the ointment on it but something in the back of my head is telling me to let it dry out. I don't know what to do. The ointment doesn't help the itching much either! It doesn't look infected or anything and it's not any redder than the area has been so I'm pretty sure it's okay---at this point anyway. But darn, it itches!
Today was the first day that I didn't take any advil. Yea! I don't seem to be swollen and the bruising continues to resolve. I still feel a little tightness around the inner corners of both upper lids, more on the left but I'm thinking that's because I didn't have that much skin left to work with. I'm hoping it loosens up a bit over time. The left corner is still a little lower than the right corner so that hasn't changed. Its a little less noticeable today because I'm not swollen at all, or at least I don't appear to be. But that itching in that one spot is about to drive me insane. I'm thinking about putting some benedryl ointment on it but as I said before, I don't know if it would be better to just let it dry out. Ugh! I want to scratch it but I definitely know better than that! Maybe I should try not to get that side wet in the shower for a few days. Will let you know how that goes.
Meanwhile, here are this afternoon's photos. It's coming along...

11 days post op

Today I woke up with 2 swollen eyes. I have NO idea why either! I took some advil and that helped. By early this afternoon, the swelling had gone down.
Another thing, my left eye feels like it's not opening all the way and when I look at the photos I do see that the inner corner (upper lid) isn't rising up as far as the other one. I skimmed back through all of the photos and this doesn't seem to be anything new. I guess I just hadn't realized it. The right upper lid has definitely slid back up faster. I'm not sure if the left one will stay this way but I hope it doesn't! I'm still a little bruised but in person, it doesnt look like bruises any more. It looks more like huge dark circles under my eyes. I usually have dark circles anyway because of the olive complexion but these are different. I can tell its remnant or resolving bruises. Anyone else would just think I was tired.
The little raw spot seems to be better today. It's not hurting anymore. I just have a tightness feeling where the corner isn't going up correctly. Either way, I think they are healing up nicely. I'll be glad when the bottom incisions fill in and fade. They are already doing that but I get a little impatient sometimes. I want it to happen faster!
Nothing else exciting to report. Will update on the left inner corner tomorrow.